English Writing - 25

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Only people who earn a lot of money are successful. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

 

I disagree with this statement. I think there are many kinds of ways to define defined as a success. And one of them is earning a lot of money. First, all people who have been remembered are not rich. For example, many historical people who made ridiculous results suffered from poverty. Second, some people donate their own money to poor people. Even if they had no money, they said it was okay. And I and you respect these people surely. In conclusion, there are many methods to get a successful life.

 

Again, you have good topic sentences and a good thesis statement. However, you seem to miss a lot of details within your writing. Try to write some examples in your sentences to support your topic sentence. Also, don't capitalize words after a comma because a comma does not indicate that the sentence is over. After a period, you need to capitalize the first letter of the first word but not after a comma.